We love shitty movies. Well, I love shitty movies. As far as recent movies go, they don’t get much shittier than the Sharknado franchise. When the first announcement popped up for the first Sharknado, I was already on board. It had been a while since I had seen something so far around the horrible circle that it came back to ‘good.’ It’s like when you eat so much at the barbecue you eat yourself hungry again. These movies did not disappoint.
I’m convinced that the writer, Thunder Levin, took the whole Sharknado thing seriously until they finally shot the first installment. On film, there is no one who could take it as anything other than the silly nonsense that it is. The actors, especially Ian Ziering, seemed like they were actually trying. Well, Tara Reid didn’t, but the only decent thing she’s ever done is The Big Lebowski (and maybe Van Wilder) where she basically played herself.
So, why bother reviewing this franchise this late in the game? I mean, the folks who are going to watch it already have, right? Wrong. Some of you haven’t seen it yet, or you started and just couldn’t get into it. I’m going to tell you the formula to send this franchise into the ‘favorites’ realm.
How to enjoy a shitty movie
First, you must realize that everything that happens in all 4 of them is funny. If you take any of it seriously you’re already too dumb to watch them. Second, you must abuse at least one substance either before starting or while watching.* Let that substance be your favorite. If you live in a weed legal state or you’re a filthy scofflaw, go that route. DO NOT, under any circumstance, use any substance known or suspected to cause hallucinations. Third, you must watch with either like-minded people or someone who would rather do literally anything else (your non-nerdy spouse or significant other is a good choice). The ideal scenario is a mixture of the two. Finally, play a game. Take a shot every time you recognize one of the famous people who gets eaten by a shark or every time someone delivers a trite, half-assed line. On second thought, don’t do that…you will die.
If you do those things, this series of films will amount to roughly 6 hours and 9 minutes (probably not in a row unless you’re a machine) of giggles and incredulous WTFs that you will never regret.
Quick rundown of the recommendations
- Don’t take it seriously
- Do drugs (alcohol or weed if that’s your thing)
- Not hallucinogens
- Watch with friends and/ or soon to be mortal enemies
- Make it a game
Oh, and remember. Sharknado 5 was in pre-production as of the date of this article. Watch for it.
*We at MING do not condone the use of illegal substances. You do you, though.
